Why Some Good Youth Wrestlers Will Never Be Great Youth Wrestlers
Today I am writing this mindset article in the context of youth wrestling, but by no means does this apply only to young athletes who wrestle. This same concept applies to all athletes who participate in youth sports across the board.
With that said, there is a basic mindset conflict that will stop a good youth wrestler from being great. By great I mean go undefeated and win every ABC national tournament from Super 32 and Tulsa to Folkstyle and Freestyle nationals. On the other hand, a good youth wrestler wins most of the time, but not all the time. Furthermore, a good youth wrestler won’t ever win against a great youth wrestler in any context. In fact, a great youth wrestler will likely defeat a wrestler who is just good by a large margin, if not a pin.
For a parent of a youth wrestler who is just good, this may not be the news you want to hear, but this is perfectly fine. You have nothing to worry about. Indeed, making it a priority to train a good youth wrestler to beat a great youth wrestler would be a mistake if being a great wrestler beyond 8th grade is the goal.
The Choice Between Great in the Short-Term vs. Great in the Long-Term
It’s important for parents to understand that to be a great youth wrestler, parents and coaches must optimize that young athlete for the short-term. By definition, when you optimize for the short-term you can’t optimize for the long-term at the same time. This is a mindset conflict.
There will always be competition against the short-term vs. the long term. Those who choose the short-term will win in the short-term against those who choose the long-term. Those who choose the long-term will win in the long-term against those who choose the short-term. Additionally, those who make no choice or who are wishy-washy between the two lose both in the short and long-term.
Unquestionably, parents of youth wrestling “stars” are making a choice to win in the short-term. I am not here to judge that choice. However, I will say there are very few parents and athletes to traverse the treacherous waters of youth stardom successfully.
If you are a parent of a good young athlete, be good with that. It’s okay that you haven’t pushed them to be great in the short-term. As my favorite blogger Seth Godin wisely states quite cynically:
There’s always someone who is more willing to play the short-term game than you are… Someone who is willing to cut more corners, send a more urgent text, borrow against the future, ignore the side effects, abuse trust and corrupt the system–somehow justifying that short-term hustle with a rationalization (usually a selfish one) about how urgent it is.
On the other hand…There’s plenty of room to win as someone who takes a longer view than the others.
While cynical, Godin’s words are still unquestionably true. As a result, there is little chance to win competing against someone optimizing for the short-term when you’re optimizing for the long-term. So, if your child is in the sport for the long-term, accept this fact and move on.
Don’t waste your energy worrying about your child losing against another wrestler who’s in it for the short-term. Short-term youth athletes won’t be around in the long-term, and short-term setbacks don’t outweigh long-term comebacks.