How Will You Decide Your Next Move After a Failure?
Deciding that you will learn from a failure is not how you will decide your next move after a failure. Of course, learning from failure is always a goal, but goals aren’t how you make decisions either. Literally, after you finish reading this, the very next thing you do is 100% dependent on your values. Yes, that’s right your values.
Goals are outcomes, values are behaviors. Simply put, you can’t wish your way to a goal, you can’t “sad” your way to a goal, and you can’t “anger” your way to a goal. You must behave your way there. Moreover, values define how you will behave regardless of the outcome.
Resilience comes from values. Self-motivation comes from values. Self-control comes from values. Discipline comes from values. Mental toughness comes from values. Work ethic comes from values. Integrity comes from values.
What separates those who learn from failure and reach their goals and those who don’t are values. Everything in life comes down to how your values guide you to make the next thing you do a behavior that either helps you or hurts you.
What are your Values?
Generally speaking, people think about their goals often but only think about their values occasionally. My gut tells me the reason for this is that people view goals as something tangible and values as intangible. However, the truth is actually the opposite. Values are more tangible than goals.
Achieving or failing to achieve a goal is just like all other outcomes. It’s something that happens in an instant and then becomes history. What’s more, this intangible moment in time is not only extremely unpredictable but you also have very little control over it.
On the other hand, behaviors are part of your everyday life, and these behaviors are the tangible representation of your values. Furthermore, unlike a goal, a value isn’t set just because you say so. For example, just because someone says they value honesty or loyalty doesn’t make it true. Their behavior over time must represent honesty and loyalty, and only then will these traits become part of their values.
If you want to change your future, think more about your values and how your behavior does or does not represent those values. Do you value preparation, commitment, purpose, quality, work ethic, winning, or competition? In what order of priority do you set your values?
For example, do you value winning more than being a competitor? If so, you may avoid tough competition so you can win more often. This may stop you from reaching a goal.
Unquestionably, having self-awareness about what you value is often the key to unlocking what you need to truly learn from a failure. This in turn will guide the behavior changes you must make to make your next move the right move.