The Fine Line That Separates a Bad and a Good Sports Parent
There is a very fine line that separates a bad sports parent and a good sports parent. What’s more, every elite athlete whose parents have become famous because of the way they pushed their child at a young age tiptoed this fine line.
Earl Woods, Richard Williams, and LaVar Ball are a few of the success stories that immediately stand out. Unfortunately, however, there are far more unsuccessful stories we never hear than the success stories. In addition, each of these success stories could have easily gone a different way. Furthermore, the one critical factor that defines this fine line is not something a parent has any influence on.
One parent pushing their child to the brink could be doing the right thing, and another parent doing the same thing could be doing the wrong thing. Simply stated, good parenting and bad parenting is less about what you do and how you do it. Instead, good parenting and bad parenting depends much more on who the child is and what the child wants.
What the Athlete Wants from Their Parent Is the Difference Between a Bad and a Good Sports Parent
If a young athlete is deeply passionate about being the best and truly loves their sport, a parent pushing them to the brink of their capabilities may be exactly what they want and need. On the other hand, if a young athlete just wants to have fun and be a kid, they will resent their parent forever for pushing them too hard to play sports.
This is the fine line between a good sports parent and a bad sports parent. A bad sports parent is one who copies what they see other parents doing without any regard of their athlete’s personality, what they want, and how they best can achieve it. Occasionally this bad sports parent turns out looking good because of luck. They get lucky that their child develops the passion and self-motivation despite of everything else. But this is the exception and not the rule. Most kids want to be kids first not athletes first.
The best thing a parent of a child who has the potential to be an elite athlete can do is let their child own the process. This means pushing them to develop self-motivation and avoiding carrot and stick motivation at all cost.
If you do this it won’t guarantee you will develop an elite athlete. However, it will guarantee you will raise an independent adult who grows to love and respect you as a parent regardless of how their athletic career turns out.