Becoming a Better Sports Dad by Taming the Crazy Dad Inside
Three years ago I realized I wasn’t having much fun being a sports dad. I had tons of fun playing sports when I was a kid. My best childhood memories are of me and my dad driving to practice and going to wrestling tournaments.
My dad didn’t really push me too hard. He just kind of let me do my thing. From time to time, he gave me suggestions on what I can do and where I could go to get better. But It was up to me to follow through.
I thought because I didn’t reach my sports goals that I should be tougher than my dad with my kids. In my mind, my dad should have pushed me harder.
The truth is, however, there’s a middle ground that I am thankful to have found.
Taming the Crazy Dad with Balance
Now I can admit that up until about 3 years ago, I was a certified crazy sports dad. I would punish my son for having a bad practice. I would sacrifice his time with family and friends to send him to camps. Occasionally, I would even give him the silent treatment for losing. What’s more, my son wasn’t even 10 years old yet.
I know, I know…This is awful and it pains me to admit how bad of a dad I was.
I’m thankful that these days are behind me. I realize now I’d rather my son not reach whatever pie in the sky sports goals, than have him hate me. I’m still a tough dad with high expectations. However, I’m now more realistic about how hard I can push my sons to reach those expectations.
The truth is, I can’t push very hard at all without pushing them away. So the next best thing I can do is raise my sons with values that lead to self-motivation. This is how you balance the crazy dad inside.
Instead of being crazy about my kids winning and getting to the next level, I’m crazy about modeling and teaching core values. This mindset change has been instrumental in helping me become a better dad.