Developing a Child’s Self-Awareness
Self-awareness is arguably the most important of the four domains of emotional intelligence. Without it, it’s hard to develop competencies in the other three domains of self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.
Simply stated, self-awareness is one’s ability to understand how they are feeling about themselves and the world around them. A highly self-aware person can provide an honest assessment of their strengths and weaknesses. In addition, a highly self-aware person can recognize their current emotional state and can assess the impact their emotions will have on a situation.
5 Keys To Developing Self-Awareness in Children
- The first key to developing self-awareness in a child is build their self-confidence and help them develop a strong sense of self-worth. When someone is self-confident, they have a positive outlook on life and will show themselves more compassion. This is important because if you constantly beat yourself up over your weaknesses and emotional reactions, you are less likely to be honest with yourself.
- Use the tools provided by Gallup to discover a child’s strengths. Children ages 10-14 can take the Clifton’s Youth Strengths Explorer and those older than 15 can take the Clifton Strengths Finder. For younger children, you can use the strengths spotting techniques explained in this article.
- Push children out of their comfort zone early and often. For example, you can have them try a sport like youth wrestling. Youth wrestling is a sport known for building self-awareness because it’s such an emotional sport that forces children to deal with winning and losing in front of friends and family in unique ways. It’s one of the few sports that actually requires children to learn how to lose in order to win.
- Use storytelling and examples from the real world, in books, movies, music and news to explain emotions and how they impact others. When you see your children in various emotional states, help them recall these examples to explain their feelings to them and let them know they are not alone.
- Help your children understand their emotional triggers. Recognize when and why they have rapid emotional shifts, and keep a mental note. When their emotions get back to normal, discuss the trigger and help them develop coping techniques to manage their triggers.